HOW TO LIVE WITH A DIFFICULT HUSBAND.

"A Christian wife should live with a difficult husband so that he is attracted to Christ by her behaviour." 

Someone has said, “Usually the husband regards himself as the head of the household, and the pedestrian has the right of way. And, usually, both of them are safe until they try to prove it.” Preachers are probably safe until they speak on a text which tells wives to submit to disobedient husbands!
Christian psychologist James Dobson wrote a book encouraging wives with disobedient husbands to practice “tough love.” How does this fit in with submission?
A wife has to develop a submissive spirit, to be chaste, reverent, gentle and quiet, with an emphasis on the inner person rather than on outward appearance. So even though I direct my comments to wives who have unbelieving husbands, the principles apply to us all, men and women alike.

First, a wife has to understand that her behaviour at all times matters a lot in her marriage. Until you understand why a bride is the one celebrated during a wedding, why she is the custodian of the wedding certificate, etc, you will have difficulty in understanding why a marriage truly revolves around the essence of being the wife. 

Now, for every successful marriage, it takes a wife with "Attractive behaviour" in all aspects to continually win her husband's heart over and over.
Her "attractive behaviour" encompasses all the qualities I mentioned earlier and they are as follows;

1. Attractive behaviour that involves submission:
In the Holy Bible, Sarah called Abraham lord. I also heard a story about a wife who fell into bed and exclaimed, “Lord, I'm tired!” Her husband calmly said, “My dear, in the privacy of our own bedroom, you can call me Jim.” Proper submission doesn't require addressing your husband as lord. But the principle is, submission is reflected by your speech. The tone of your voice and the words you speak reflect whether you respect your husband and are in submission to him, or whether you’re in a power struggle against him.
The source of many marital problems is that the wife is seeking to control the husband to meet what she perceives as her needs and the husband is seeking to dominate the wife to meet what he perceives as his needs. So you have a constant tug of war going on. That’s not the biblical pattern for husbands or wives. The biblical pattern is for the wife to yield control to the husband and to do all she can to please him and make him prosper. The husband is not to dominate, but to do all he can to bless and protect his wife so that she prospers in the Lord. Here’s the catch: You can’t wait for your partner to come up to some acceptable level of performance before you start to do your part. You must obey what God has told you to do and let Him take care of your partner.

2. Attractive behaviour that involves purity:
This means that a wife who wants to win her husband to Christ must live in obedience to God. She will be morally pure. Her husband won’t distrust her because she’s a flirt with other men. She won’t use deception or dishonesty to try to get her own way. She will learn to handle anger in a biblical way. Her hope will be in God (3:5) so that she will have a sweet spirit, even toward a difficult husband. He will see Christlikeness in her.

3. Attractive behaviour that involves reverence:
This could mean respect toward her husband.The idea is that a godly wife will live in the fear of God, aware that He sees all that is going on (“in the sight of God,” 3:4). To live in the fear of God means that we recognize His holiness and wrath against all sin and therefore live obediently, even when it’s hard.

4. Attractive behaviour that involves no nagging:
Nothing will drive a man further from the Lord than a nagging wife. Solomon said it 3,000 years ago, and it’s still true, “It is better to live in a corner of a roof, than in a house shared with a contentious woman” (Prov. 21:9). Nagging will drive your husband crazy, but it won’t drive him to Christ. I heard about a husband who nicknamed his wife Peg although that wasn’t her name. When he was asked why, he replied, “Well, Peg is short for Pegasus who was an immortal horse, and an immortal horse is an everlasting nag, so that’s why I call my wife Peg!” Nagging will do one of two things to men: Either it will make him resist and become obstinate, or he will give in to keep the peace. Either response is not good for the wife. If the husband becomes more obstinate, he can become abusive. This creates distance in the relationship. If he gives in to keep the peace, he becomes passive and the wife is put in the role of the decision maker, out from under the covering of blessing and protection that God designed proper authority to be.
Thus attractive behaviour involves submission, purity, reverence toward God, and not nagging.

5. Attractive behaviour that involves a gentle and quiet spirit:
In the Holy Bible, Peter says that such a spirit is precious in the sight of God. I would also add that it is precious in the sight of a husband! What does it mean? “Gentle” is the word sometimes translated “meek.” It is used of Jesus (Matt. 11:29; 21:5). It does not mean weakness of the Caspar Milquetoast variety, but rather strength under submission or control. A horse that is powerful but responsive to the slightest tug of its master is a “gentle” horse. So it refers to a wife who is not selfishly assertive, but rather who yields her rights without yielding her strength of character.
“Quiet” does not mean mute, but rather tranquil or calm, not combative. A quiet woman exudes a confidence in her role and giftedness. She is not out to prove anything, because she is secure in who she is in the Lord. She may be “quiet” and yet be articulate and persuasive in presenting her point of view. But she doesn't do it in a demanding or obnoxiously assertive way. She is at peace with herself in the Lord. The word “spirit” hints that these qualities are broad enough to allow room for personality differences.

6. Attractive behaviour that involves doing what is right:
If your husband yells at you and you yell back, it escalates the conflict. He will yell louder, then you yell louder yet, and if things get out of hand, he may lose control and say all sorts of nasty things that he wouldn’t say when he’s more rational or he may even hit you. But if he yells at you and you calmly respond, “I can understand why you’re upset. What can I do to help?” you’ve just de escalated the quarrel. How can a man fight with that kind of response?

7. Attractive behaviour that involves an emphasis on the inner person over outward appearance:
Consider this story; A young officer who was blinded during a war met and later married one of the nurses who took care of him in the hospital. One day he overheard someone say, “It was lucky for her that he was blind, since no one who could see would marry such a homely woman.” He walked toward the voice and said, “I overheard what you said, and I thank God from the depths of my heart for blindness of eyes that might have kept me from seeing the marvellous worth of the soul of this woman who is my wife. She is the most noble character I have ever known; if the conformation of her features is such that it might have masked her inward beauty to my soul then I am the great gainer by having lost my sight.

In addition, read the admonitions for couples in the gospel of PETER in the Bible. 
Your Marriage is blessed. AMEN!